Remember the days when you were a liberated soul, rejoicing every moment and each day presented you with a new experience. Those were the days when you only thought about yourself, your life and sometimes your career. Those were the days when your friends were your most cherished assets.Then, she came so uninvited. Short messages became long calls, occasional drops became long drives and small meetings became weekend outings. You laughed with her and you cried with her. You suddenly became brave enough to even risk your job and stand up to your boss to squeeze in some time into your schedule to take her out on a lunch that made your day, you wanted to hear more of her stories, hold her hand and smile together. You cherished those long drives, romantic rides and saying sorry with a dairy milk to make it up to her after a silly fight. You gave her your shoulder to cry on, supported her, cheered her, stood by her in all her endeavours, believed that she is the one, exceeded your own strengths to spent all the time in the world with her, above all loved her like the air that you breath in to stay alive.
Kept your friends waiting because you only wanted to see her smile all day long and just didn't care about anything else around you, ignored the heartbreak warnings coming from your most trusted friends, looked at life through her eyes and everything around seemed so utopian, each day you woke up excited to share another day of your life with her.You expected only her love in return. Every time the phone lit up you hoped its a message from her. You just wanted to hold her hand and grow old with her.
Then, suddenly she inflicts you with the greatest pain of your life which you never deserved, your heart aches, eyes flood with tears, voice trembles. Suddenly you hear a thousand questions in your head since now your heart has gone silent and the voice of your mind which was suppressed all this time speaks up.
You wonder why she did this to you? Why she, of all the people hurt you the most? Why she chose to leave you when you wanted her more than ever?
You suddenly find yourself staring at a large void left behind by her. You cry, you scream, you go numb, you burn down your memories, you break things, you hope to booze out your pain, but no matter however hard you try, a slow realization creeps in that this pain is here to stay for sometime and it will take a long long time to even start healing. Your only hope now is that grandma Harlend was right:
"love makes time pass, but time is certain to make love pass..."
But then you are not the first one and will not be the last to fall in love. Many have survived its pain and have happily lived their lives even though their first love always remains somewhere deep down their hearts.
